AT&T were being so useless I thought I’d wrap it up with a simple question and some mindfucking games.
Liza: Are there any other questions I can help answer today? AD: do you know the value of π? AD: that’s pi Liza: What value are you referring to exactly? AD: pi AD: the mathematical constant whose value is the ratio of any circle’s circumference to its diameter Liza: Are you wondering the cost of the plans? Liza: No, unfortunately, we do not have that information available. Do you have any other plan or service questions I can help you with? AD: also known as Archimedes’ Constant Liza: No, unfortunately, we do not have that information available. Do you have any other plan or service questions I can help you with AD: you don’t really type these things, do you? AD: you copy and then paste them from a list of things you can say, right? Liza: I am typing directly to you. I would be happy to help answer any other service related questions you have! AD: I have sooooo many questions Liza: What questions can I help you with? AD: nah, don’t worry about it AD: I wouldn’t want to bother you Liza: No problem at all! I would be happy to help answer any of your service or phone related questions! What can I help you with? AD: that’s alright AD: tell you what… I’ll come back tomorrow and you and I can chat about stuff and things AD: what do you think? Liza: Sounds great! If you have any questions tomorrow come back and chat with us any time! Liza: Thank you for choosing AT&T! Have a great evening! AD: any time AD: that sounded just like the Predator when he synthesises that guy’s voice Liza: Thank you. Are there any other questions I can answer for you before closing our chat? Liza: I haven’t heard from you for a while. Would you like to continue chatting? AD: hello, are you still there? Liza: Yes, I am here. Are there any other questions I can help answer today? AD: I thought we agreed we were going to talk tomorrow Liza: I just wanted to make sure there was nothing else. Thank you so much for your time today and we look forward to chatting with you again soon! Liza: Thank you for choosing AT&T! Have a great evening!
The chat session has been closed by your AT&T sales representative.
Jessica: Let’s move this chat and make it a window of its own. Please click ‘Move Chat Window’ to move it now. AD: Done. Perfect. Much cozier this way.
(…) Jessica: Oh I see. Then yes, they may need a TV set for the installation process. AD: Keyword being may, like the month.
(…) Jessica: I recommend calling our Customer Service Team. AD: Perfect. I’ll do so in the morning. Right now I’m going to bed because I’m very sleepy. It’s been a very long day. I bet you’re tired too. It’s late, you should get some sleep. Jessica: Thank you for the concern. Is there anything else I can help you with today? AD: Jessica, you’ve been brilliant. Thanks so much for your help. I think that’s all.
Welcome to Overstock.com Live Chat, you will be joined with a chat representative as quickly as possible. You are now chatting with Stuart.
Stuart: Hello, how can I help you? AD: Hi Stu, how are you? Stuart: Hi, I’m doing good, thanks for asking. Stuart: How about you? AD: pretty good, pretty good AD: tell me something Stu, do you sleep on a memory foam mattress? Stuart: I’m sorry, I don’t. AD: you see, I wanted to buy one. Am actually eyeing this really good one you guys sell but I’m concerned about your returns policy Stuart: That’s fine, I will help you further. Stuart: Have you found one? AD: yeah, it’s pretty sweet AD: do you want to check it out? AD: It’s this one: http://www.overstock.com/Home-Garden/Comfort-Dreams-11-inch-Select-A-Firmness-Memory-Foam-Queen-size-Mattress/3158654/product.html AD: I’ve read some reviews that say the firmness is a bit hit and miss Stuart: Sure, I will check on that. AD: I’m concerned I’ll get one that’s too firm and won’t be able to exchange it for a softer one Stuart: The ‘Comfort Dreams 11-inch Select-A-Firmness Memory Foam Queen-size Mattress’ is a great choice, however once opened this product is non-returnable. We do not have an exchange option for this item too. AD: do you have any mattresses that have an exchange option? Stuart: Please check on the dimensions, refer the description for details and then go ahead with the order. Stuart: I’m sorry, we have exchange option only for rings. AD: I can’t sleep on a ring AD: I tried once. I woke up with really bad back pain. Stuart: I understand. AD: Oh, so you’ve slept on a ring before too? Stuart: No, I was referring to the pain. Stuart: This mattress is composed of one 2-inch layer of 4-pound memory foam and one 2-inch layer of 3-pound memory foam atop a 7-inch core of traditional urethane foam. AD: Is that the configuration for the soft, medium or firm mattress? Stuart: Yes, you are correct. AD: I’m afraid it wasn’t a yes or no question. AD: my understanding is that a 5 pound memory foam layer is firmer than a 3 pound memory foam. Stuart: Yes, it is the comfort level option you can choose for the mattress. AD: so the configuration you provided must be different depending on firmness, no? AD: Oh, sorry. I got distracted. There was an owl outside my window. AD: Scared me a bit. Stuart: That’s fine. Stuart: Have I addressed all your concerns today? AD: “No he has not” - said my girlfriend AD: I’m afraid we’re still confused as to the configuration of the memory foam layers and how it compares to the different levels of firmness Stuart: It is the soft, firm and medium option I’m referring to. AD: I’m with you AD: I have a choice of soft, medium and firm. AD: and the mattress is made out of 3 layers: 2in memory foam + 2in memory fam + 7in traditional urethane foam AD: on the website it says the first two layers are 4lb and 3lb respectively AD: I’m trying to understand what that relates to in terms of which level of firmness AD: because different levels of firmness will have different densities AD: so the soft option might be 3lb + 3lb AD: and the firm 5lb + 3lb AD: it’s not clear on the website Stuart: It is the material used and the layers of the mattress, more the density more the comfort. AD: am I in the Twilight Zone? AD: I feel like I’ve been here before. AD: if you ever come to buy a new mattress would you consider buying this one for yourself? AD: and if so, what level of firmness? AD: (though I understand you and I might prefer different firmness levels) Stuart: Yes, you can go with soft option which is only the top most layer of the mattress. the comfort level if from all the layers of the mattress displayed. AD: Stu, that was brill AD: I think that’s all I need to know. AD: It’s getting late so I might go to bed now. Stuart: Sure. Stuart: Please decide on it and order it later. AD: Unfortunately I’m sleeping on an air mattress. I wish I had a memory foam bed but I don’t know which one to choose. AD: Are you tired too Stu? AD: I mean, it’s pretty late. Time for bed, no? Stuart: I’m fine, I can help you with your concerns. AD: That’s great. I’m just concerned you might be tired too. Stuart: If you are tired, you can contact us later too. AD: Oh, is now not a good time? Stuart: I can good to help you, since you are tired you can contact us later any time. Stuart: We are available any time round the clock. AD: No need. I think I have all the info I need. AD: Goodbye. Stuart: Okay. Stuart: Thanks for visiting Overstock.com. Your feedback is important. Please click ‘Close’ and complete the brief survey which appears. It takes less than one minute.
A (Simon Mawar): Not until you can plug your brain into a USB port and download War and Peace direct into your cerebrum. There’ll be a Microsoft application that will claim to do it within five years – but every now and again it’ll lock your brain up and you’ll have to reboot and reinstall everything, starting with The Tale of Peter Rabbit and Thomas the Tank Engine.
There are number of commands you can run to check who’s logged in to your system, e.g. w, who, finger and users. If you happen to spot a login with an idle state and wish to get rid of it then grab the ttys name (you can find this using w or who) and query the process status for that particular terminal device as per this example:
ps -ft ttys001
This returns a list of the processes running under that terminal. Pick the process ID (PID) for the login command and kill it:
On my ride to work today I jumped a light just as it turned red (yes, yes, I know). As I was merging onto the main road so was a Police van that was coming from the other side. The dude goes “was that a red light?” and I immediately (yet a bit nervously) retorted “no it was yellow” and then thought I should be more convincing and clear so turned around again and shouted “AMBER!”. As Matt put it, saying yellow made me sound like a tourist and not someone the Queen waves at (which she did once).
I often have days like this. The other common occurrence is searching for a song, hitting play on the first result and, 30 minutes later, realise that I’ve just been listening to 6 versions of the same song including some really bad covers and 2 other songs that just so happen to have the same title but have nothing to do with what you wanted.
In a desperate quest for some free space on my hard-drive I ran Monolingual on my work laptop, choosing to remove what I considered to be unnecessary Languages, Input Menus and Architectures, and was surprised to see a 4GB gain. I also ran it on my home laptop but, oddly, it only freed 1.5GB of disk space.
I haven’t noticed any issues on my home machine but iTunes and anything that required iSight (Photo Booth, Skype, etc) stopped working on my work MacBook Pro. Opening any of these apps just caused them to automatically close immediately after. There wasn’t any thing in Console’s error logs which made it that much harder to figure out what the issue was.
After much mucking about (including re-installing the Mac OS X 10.5.8 Combo Update) I’ve managed to fix the problem by re-installing Flip4Mac and Perian. I also re-installed iTunes but I don’t think that was necessary.
Usually performed on a sleeping or otherwise unsuspecting person, the perpetrator of a wet willy wets his or her finger with saliva and inserts it into the ear of the victim. A variant known as the Slimy Buffo involves the making of an OK sign and then closing of the bottom fingers to form a fist-like cup. The rim of the thumb and pointer finger are licked and a loogie is sometimes spit into the center. This rim is then slapped up under the chin of an unsuspecting victim. The Slimy Buffo has fallen out of practice since the early 1990s due to the potential risk of dental injury to victims.
Who decided the Slimy Buffo had to go? I was never consulted. Is there a special organisation or commission that regulates school pranks? Does it have its own ombudsman?
Google Chrome doesn’t prompt the user for confirmation when trying to close a window or multiple tabs. They claim they don’t do it because they’d rather not interrupt the users when “most of the time they actually want to close the window”. I think this breaks with years of common behaviour present in a multitude of applications and, in my opinion, can be quite harmful specially if you consider a great deal of browsing experiences these days aren’t stateless: it’s a pain if you happen to close a window half way through purchasing something, mid chat or email composition. I like destructive actions to have an extra safety check - so much so that the first alias I add to all my shells is a prompt for rm:
alias rm='rm -i'
I’d like to see a close window/multiple tabs prompt and I’d take it one step further and, as does Safari, request confirmation when attempting to close a tab in which text has been inserted in an input or textarea field.
Despite all this the solutions they’ve put in place to handle tab/window restore, explained by Nick in the video above, are cleverly simple.
